You'd think that Nevada would've gone all-in by now to procure their own football franchise. Michael Vick would ask to be traded immediately.
As of August 1st, the NFL offseason can officially be deemed over, and BOVADA
betting lines have last year's 15-1 heartbroken Green Bay Packers as the favorites to win it all in 2012-13. Aspiring New England perfectionists, San Francisco and Houston break-out dice rollers, and the Philadelphia Roulette nightmares complete the five-card studded poker hand, while the reigning champion New York Giants are receiving just enough credit to respectfully remain navy blue dark horses.
Whether or not these preseason odds amount to anything come February, Las Vegas truly personifies the dwindling summer days of blooming boasts and fantasized putting of money where our mouths are, and the posted probabilities should be given some consideration before legally wagering with friend and foe.
That being said, while most of us will be dissecting every Brian Hoyer completion and practice squad position battle, the democracy that is Football Nation looks to spend the next month game planning around these gathered statistics and prophesying Super Bowl XLVII's eventual victor. Naturally, we will require YOUR votes in order to do so.
First and foremost, who does Vegas have reaching the playoffs? On to the bracket:
1. Houston Texans
(12/1 odds) - This is where I'm putting my hard-earned $200 paycheck.
2. Tennessee Titans (50/1) - Sorry kids but Kenny has been grounded for his DUI and can't play the slots with you today.
3. Indianapolis Colts (100/1) - Remind me what the last name of their starting quarterback is...
4. Jacksonville Jaguars (200/1) - If all of their players were on the field, then the odds wouldn't be this
1. Green Bay Packers
(6/1) - On paper, they're a hot commodity again, but will they be drawn another 2-7 offsuit in January?
2. Chicago Bears
(16/1) - I'm placing my $100 Bank of America account bonus over here.
3. Detroit Lions (22/1) - This looks more like the ratio of arrested players to overrated coaching staffs.
4. Minnesota Vikings (150/1) - Zygi Wilf's "NFC North champions" could get their new stadium sooner.
1. New England Patriots
(13/2) - For all of the card counters out there.
2. New York Jets (28/1) - Antonio Cromartie's team has the second-best Super Bowl odds in the division.
3. Buffalo Bills (50/1) - They stepped into Hooters for dinner - they're almost there.
4. Miami Dolphins (75/1) - I'll just stock up on 19-cent shrimp cocktails instead.
1. San Francisco 49ers
(10/1) - Read it and weep, Vernon Davis.
2. Seattle Seahawks (50/1) - Pete Carroll = Coach/Booster of the Year.
3. Arizona Cardinals (60/1) - Kevin Kolb bruised his right thigh on Day One as the refocused starter. Look at your life, look at your choices.
4. St. Louis Rams (75/1) - Jeff Fisher sounds like the perfect World Series of Poker name...yeah, and Lady Gaga is my image consultant.
1. Pittsburgh Steelers
(16/1) - I guess they still like what's hiding behind aging Steel Curtain No. 1.
2. Baltimore Ravens
(18/1) - Not bad considering offseason contract disputes, injury concerns, and Joe Flacco's newfound elite status.
3. Cincinnati Bengals (40/1) - Siegfried and Roy will now be releasing the tigers from their cages.
4. Cleveland Browns (200/1) - From the people who brought you Peyton Hillis' Madden Cover upset...yeah, no.
1. Philadelphia Eagles
(12/1) - Well, Vick, you have $100 million. Dish it out.
2. New York Giants
(18/1) - Tom Coughlin owns this casino as a 6-seed.
3. Dallas Cowboys (18/1) - Hit me...hit me...
4. Washington Redskins (60/1) - RG3 is 22 years old, so anything can happen.
1. Denver Broncos
(16/1) - Hey, three bulging-disc-shaped bananas in a row!
2. San Diego Chargers
(25/1) - "Honey, you just raised that gentleman the deed to our house. Can you PLEASE stop gambling and come home?!"
3. Kansas City Chiefs (45/1) - The under aged Chiefs aren't going to just settle for their paper routes and lemonade stands.
4. Oakland Raiders (75/1) - I'll bet all of the silver in the world that this won't happen.
1. New Orleans Saints
(18/1) - Their high risk-reward offense will have a huge say, plus they have side pots going.
2. Atlanta Falcons (25/1) - Never mind - they just rolled another 4 and 1.
3. Carolina Panthers (35/1) - Vegas doesn't believe Ryan Kalil's guarantee is too
4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (75/1) - Empty out the treasure chest...
Now to recap:
AFC Playoff Picture
1. New England Patriots
2. Houston Texans
3. Denver Broncos
4. Pittsburgh Steelers
5. Baltimore Ravens
6. San Diego Chargers
NFC Playoff Picture
1. Green Bay Packers
2. San Francisco 49ers
3. Philadelphia Eagles
4. New Orleans Saints
5. Chicago Bears
6. New York Giants
As much as I would pay to see Tebow Mania in Sin City, or cash the younger Chiefs, Bengals, or Panthers checks, you have a decent chance of finding the next Super Bowl winner in one of these 12 briefcases.
In the end, the decision lies with YOU, so who do YOU believe is going to win it all this season? Let's take a road trip and up the ante:
Super Bowl Champion: Chicago Bears or New Orleans Saints?
IT - Chicago
Super Bowl Champion: San Diego Chargers or Denver Broncos?
IT - in that case...Denver
Super Bowl Champion: Baltimore Ravens or Pittsburgh Steelers?
IT - Baltimore
Super Bowl Champion: New York Giants or Philadelphia Eagles?
IT - New York
You can vote for each matchup in the form of a comment below, or by visiting The Italian Trojan
's Facebook page. Polls for this round will close Wednesday August 8th, the Divisional Round will commence the following day, and so forth.
May the odds be forever in your favor, or else just stuff your faces at the buffet.